Friday, August 27, 2010
The Sproing Wars
The Sproing Wars, not to be confused with the late Spring Wars or the 100 Year War (though it may last that long), are occuring in my bedroom. For those of you without cats, a Sproing is a colored plastic spring. They come in thick and thin, are light as a feather and the preferred cat toy because they are easily carried.
Napoleon considers all Sproings to be his exclusive property. Some days, he will bring a Sproing out and let his sister, Purdy von Sweets, or Fionna, the Ninjalator, look it. Touching is not allowed.
I foolishly assumed that if the Sproing population reached a critical mass, he would share. I forgot share is not in the cat vocabulary. I bought a package of the long, thin Sproings. Fionna thought they were perfect and for about an hour of Napoleonless bedroom time, she played with them. However, the bedroom is seldom without Napoleon for long and up on returning, he claimed the new Sproings for himself and hid most of them.
That night, I was vaguely aware that there was alot of sneaky movement on the bedroom floor. The next morning I almost stepped into the hall only be bowled over by Fionna in a panic. It seems all night she had ferreted out the thin Sproings and pushed them quietly under the door to be grabbed the next morning. She didn't make it. I threw one into the living room and kicked the rest back into the bedroom. I have seen a mad Napoleon and it is not a pretty picture.
However, one question has remained. Where do all the Sproings go?
As I am sitting on the bed reading, three cats attacked the suitcase in the hallway. Now, dogs will attack inanimate objects because, let's face it, most dogs are not that bright. Cats do not attack suitcases. Three of them were really beating on this suitcase when Napoleon boiled out of the top of it, knocking it and everything else four ways to Sunday.
Knowing I was forbidden to bend over after the sinus surgery, I had to call George to clear the hallway. I was trapped. In clearing the hallway, George discovered the suitcase was one of Napoleon's hidey holes for Sproings but, obviously not the only one. Napoleon is not dumb enough to put all his Sproings in one basket. I just hope I don't find one of the others by putting it on.