Tuesday, September 7, 2010

UPDATE on Myself

I know some people have been wondering what is going on and others really couldn't care less, so they can stop reading. I'll take no offense.
There are several good things that have come out of my misery. First off, due to the fact that I keep tripping over the floor, my regular doctor sent me to a neurologist. It turns that my MRI actually proves I have a working brain! I have a CD with pictures! I also have no brain damage and my cognitive functioning is excellent for someone of my age even though I did forget to pay a bill. The doctor also talked me into taking Mirapex for RLS (restless leg syndrome). In the old days, they used to call that growing pains. At 59, I think I have stopped growing and started shrinking, in fact I know I have. I am only 5' 4.5" now. What I did not know is this condition is inherited. My father could never keep his foot still. The moment he relaxed, the foot started shaking. It never occurred to me that his symptoms were just another manifestation of my "growing pains". Now that I have medication, I am sleeping for the first time in my life. I actually fall asleep in a few minutes rather than a few hours like before. This has really improved my functioning as I am not longer permanently half asleep and completely exhausted. Rested is wonderful.
I had to have my right sinus operated on and drained. The bad news is it had a "cocktail of bacteria" in it that is only killed with a combination of two antibiotics. One of the meaner bugs is also something you only pick in hospitals so this infection is actually from my previous sinus surgery over 15 years ago! I have learned that it is next to impossible for a doctor to pin point a sinus infection until it is so bad you are sicker than a dog. Then, the only way to make certain of it is a CAT Scan. So I have been sick for almost 20 years. This also explains how after 3 days of antibiotics and I feel great and then even though I continue taking them, I start to go back down hill until I end the regime as sick as I started. It takes two antibiotics. The bad news is the only one that really smacks this stuff I am allergic to and hence, twice day, for Goddess knows how long, I have to put 2 ounces ice cold antibiotic solution up each nostril and yes, it hurts. I can't warm the solution because it will destroy the antibiotic.
But this pain and suffering is not without its comic relief. Huge pieces of (well, I'll be delicate and not say what) come out of my nose upon washing. The first time, the doctor took the longest pair of tweezers you have ever seen, reached up my nose and pulled out a blood scab that had me wondering if I had just lost part of my frontal lobe. This thing would have been the envy of any small boy and talked about way into high school. Not having the tweezers or the expertise and the $20,000.00 endoscope to see what I am doing, I have to depend on the wash pushing the stuff out. Unfortunately, it breaks and with every breath, I not only make interesting whistling noises but it flaps back and forth and tickles me. This has caused George to coin a new medical term for this condition called a "dangling tickler".
Moving on, my dermatologist has concluded that I will encounter something I am allergic to if I seal myself in a cocoon and hence, twice a week, I smear myself from head to toe with cortisone lotion. This leaves me a sticky mess but I have really soft skin.
My orthopedic doctor has convinced me to just come to terms with the fact I have osteoarthritis. It is going to hurt. Get used to it. I cannot remain still for long or I seize up. I am now getting way more exercise.
I have invested in a couple of nice wigs as my hair is not returning from the cancer operation and I am finally "owning my scar". There is no point in hiding it. I have survived cancer twice now because I insisted the doctors look further and not brush me off. Cancer has taught me persistence and to not take no for an answer when my gut says otherwise.
My gastroentrologist has given me nice meds for the stomach and I am doing well on them.
I finally met Dr. Rand of the Rand Eye Institute as my other doctor is a patient of his. You have to remember, I spent 10 years working in medicine so I know a few doctors. I discovered my eyesight is fine for my age and for the first time, I was not dispatched with a prescription for expensive glasses that never work. He told me to get a pair of 1.00 glasses for the computer work and my eye sight is great and no headaches. He also told me that the things I thought I was hallucinating swimming in front of me are actually protozoa on my lens and yes, they are swimming. Exactly why I manage to see them, no one knows but it probably has something to do with my ability to see a refractive index of .005 or less.
So, going to all these doctors has been exhausting and a full time job, but I know exactly where I am and as soon as we kill the bugs in my nose, I am going to be in GREAT SHAPE! DEATH TO ALL NASAL BACTERIA!

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